American Health Insurance

"And your weight?"

"223 pounds," answered Chuck.

Alyson, the health insurance agent sucked in air from clenched teeth.

"What? Is that bad?"

"Well, it's not definitely good. Your height-weight ratio is off. We only insure healthy people. Insuring people who actually need health insurance doesn't cover the bottom line, you understand."

"Do you only insure professional athletes or something?"

The agent laughed, "We would never insure an athlete: too prone to injury. Anyway, there are several questions we still need to answer. Smoker?"

"No."

"Drink alcohol?"

"No."

"Does your body produce an excessive amount of earwax?"

"How much is 'excessive?'"

"Any."